Support is the greatest gift you can give a new mother. That, and gas drops.

I received a really great compliment yesterday evening. It wasn't about my appearance, or my work, or even my sweet angel baby. It was about an old blog post I wrote when V was about 3 months old titled "It gets easier."

In this post (if you don't feel like skimming through my archives to find it), I laid out the truth bomb that it never gets easier, you just stop caring as much about the little stuff. A long time friend of my husband's (who has now become a good friend of mine) just had her first baby. Like all new mothers, she is dealing with exhaustion, recovery, confusion, frustration, hormones, and an overwhelming sense of love for someone who she didn't even know 1 month ago.

She has sent me a text here and there asking my advice on things like how to help her baby sleep, or did I swaddle, or did V take a passie - all of the stuff that you really have to figure out from you baby. At one point she told me that she had been letting her baby boy sleep on her chest, and she added "Don't judge me."

Judge you?! Friend, I will NEVER judge you. It wasn't that long ago that I was in your slippers, trying anything to get my child to sleep between the feedings every hour and a half (three hours my BUTT). Even now, I commit the mortal mommy sin of letting her nap on me and my husband because she refuses her swing, and Lord am I TIRED after a day of work.

Which brings me to my point. There are all kinds of mommy's out there. Hippie moms, no-nonsense moms, by-the-book moms, and moms who are just figuring it out as we go (that's me.) There are a millions books out there that have done countless studies about what is best for babies, from swaddling to feeding schedules, sleep training and disposable vs. cloth diapering. Formula vs. Breastfeeding. And these books are a great resource, but that is all they are. A resource. I hate to break it to you, but there is no such thing as an instruction manual for your kid. And if you manage to write one, you might as well find a cure for the common cold while you're at it.

So the best advice that I can give new moms like myself? I don't know what you're going through, and I'll tell you what I can about what helped me. But I want you to know, I support you. I'm here for you, just as so many others have been there for me. I'll never judge your actions, I'll never say what you're doing for your child is wrong (with the exception of immunizations, please, PLEASE do that). I'll praise you for your courage, and your resilience, and I'll be the first one at the finish line of your milestones cheering and yelling "You made it!"

And all I ask is that you one day do the same for someone else you know that is going through it. Remember how hard it was, and how good it feels to have someone telling you that you are doing such a wonderful job, and your kid is really, really great.

It has helped me tremendously to have the support that I do, and for all of my readers out there, I thank you for it.

Happy Tuesday everyone!

Love,
Dominique