Sometimes I wish I were a mom in the 1800s

By today's standards, there are 1 million ways you can screw up your kid. Maybe you didn't read to them early enough. Maybe you didn't buy the right developmental toys or you let them watch TV, or you let them sleep in your bed, or let your little boy play with your heels. Maybe you did all of these things, and your child is fine.

My friend Katie is a wonderful mom. She reads to her 10 month old, she makes his food with her own ingredients, and she has breastfed him since day one, and will do so until he is at least 1. She reads the books and knows what to look for in milestones. And it works - he's practically walking already and a delightful child.

I don't do those things. Sometimes I pick her up from daycare, spend an hour with her and then drug her with gas drops, a soothie and a swing and pray she falls asleep because I'm exhausted from my day. I probably won't make her food. I barely have the energy to preheat the oven some nights for a frozen pizza, so the thought of opening a jar sounds great to me. She doesn't have any toys yet, because she's 3 1/2 months old and totally fascinated by her own feet.

Am I screwing her up forever? I doubt it. I think the developments in child studies have really improved everything, but honestly, I don't think all of it is necessary. My husband didn't have all of these things, and he's physically, emotionally, and educationally exceptional. He has perfect vision, and I'm sure he was plopped in front of sesame street a time or two in his life. He is even tempered, and I'm sure there was no book on how to teach your child feelings when he was growing up. He is very, very smart - the kind of smart that is really annoying (to me, who struggled with school, and was an average student in most subjects), and I'm sure there were nights when his mom was just too tired to read to him.

My point is, maybe my daughter won't work for NASA (and maybe she will), but I have no doubt that I'm doing all of the really important "right" things for her. She is fed, she is clothed and sheltered, she is loved. I give her gratuitous amounts of kisses in the morning, and I sing to her because it makes her smile. I change her diapers, and I hold her close when she is crying.

I think I'm doing alright, but the pressure to do all of the right things can be so overwhelming. We'll just have to see how it goes. I probably won't know for another 16 years if how I'm treating her now has affected her forever, and even then I'll likely blow if off to teenage hormones.

Happy Thursday everyone!

Love,
Dominique

10 ways I'm on my way to becoming the most momish mom ever (eat your heart out, Donna Reed)

1: The diaper bag always makes it to work with me on Mondays. It's hectic enough in the mornings without having to change everything back over to my purse, but I don't mind because I find stuff like this while searching for a pen and it's adorable:

2: I have ridiculous road rage. Like, much worse than it has ever been because the baby is with me. I have a particular hatred for :

People who ignore stop signs
People who pass me on the right without giving me a chance to even get out of their way
People who don't use their turn signal, especially when making a sudden right turn. Seriously, are you just driving with your feet?

3: I am obsessed with baby laundry. The way it smells, all of the colors and patterns, and how it only takes one fold to make it an acceptable size to fit in her drawer.

4: I have found a recent need to go to the gym and start gardening. Interesting how after nine months of growing something and taking care of my body, I have an overwhelming need to grow things and take care of my body.

5: I can get poop, boogers, pee and baby vomit all on me during any given day and I don't even flinch. Sometimes I live so dangerously that I don't even use a burp cloth (GASP!)

6: I feel like I can give newer parents than me advice. I've been doing this for what, ten minutes? Don't listen to me. Ever.

7: I talk to my baby and ask her questions, refusing to acknowledge that I'm really just talking to myself. "Have you seen mommy's hairbrush?" "What do you want to do today?" "Are you ready for your ba-ba?"

8: I  have broken up with my jeggings for good, and deleted their number.

9: I listen to children's albums, particularly Renee and Jeremy, even when I am by myself. If you haven't heard them, look it up. Genius.

10: I have never in my life cared less that no one wants to see me anymore. I'm going to Mobile this weekend and I just can't wait to show off my sweet little girly. I could be invisible and still be beaming with pride.

Happy Monday, ya'll! Enjoy your week!

Love,
Dominique

Happy Three Months, baby girl! (GIF style)

Hey Violet! You're three months old today!

And I just wanted to tell you that every day I get to wake up to you makes me feel like this:

And even though some days, you're more in this kind of mood....

99% of the time, you're doin' alright:

So go ahead and blow out those candles, you deserve it....

And dance until your heart's content...

Because you're the best little Valentine's gift I could have ever hoped for, and I love you!

Love you Sweet V! You're the coolest kid I know.

Dirty 30? Flirty 30? How about just plain ol' 30.

Guess what I get to do in less than two months? Say farewell to my 20's. I can't tell you how many TV shows or movies I've seen that portray a 30th birthday as the death of all your childhood. Something to be feared and anticipated with anxiety.

Here's my little secret: I've never feared my 30's.

I always hoped that by that time I would be mostly settled and have at least some control over my life. Sure, I'm not *totally* there yet, but let's look at my fact sheet:

• I have a totally awesome boo. That's right, I managed to get my act together long enough when I was 26 to trick someone into marrying me. And he bought it. 
• I own one half of a piece of property. While this is pretty standard for a lot of America, in the 1800s I would be a total bad-ass. 
• I have a good job, and more importantly, good benefits. Who gets excited about health insurance and 401(k)'s? I do. This stuff matters now. 
• I have a pretty adorable, healthy kid. You may have heard me talk about her. She's awesome, and she makes this face a lot:

Now, I'm not saying this to brag. I'm still a hot mess in many, many categories. But as far as the bulk of my life, I feel pretty good about where I am. I am thankful for what I have, and still excited about what is to come. So what should I do to celebrate this milestone in my years? I've never been big on my own birthday, but I feel like this one is special. I'd like to really "do it up right." Any suggestions?

Love, 

Dominique

PS- whatever I do, you're all invited!