"I woke up this morning, and suddenly realized, we're all in this together."

Excuse me for quoting Ben Lee so early on a Friday morn. I couldn't think of a better way to express my thoughts this morning, though.

A friend of mine from my sorority days at school just recently went back to work after staying at home with her daughter. She said something this morning about how people have commented to her that putting your child in daycare is like paying someone to raise your child.

I'm not outraged. I'm not even surprised. This isn't the first time I've heard such comments. It's like my daddy likes to say, "Opinions are like a-holes. Everybody's got one."

I think there's always going to be stigmas attached to every kind of parenting style. Formula feeding moms are selfish. Breastfeeding moms don't care about their babies weight. Stay at home moms are spoiled. Working moms don't raise their own children.

To use another quote (this time from the beloved movie "Three men and a little lady."):

What a crock.

I'm fortunate enough to have a close up view of each of these allegedly opposing styles. I work, and formula feed. One of my dearest friends stays at home and breast feeds.

Let me tell you, both experiences are wonderful, and both have times when it's not exactly a picnic. I have my struggles with working. Daycare is expensive, and I miss her terribly at least once during every day. I'm afraid I'm going to miss the first time she rolls over, or crawls or takes steps. I'm afraid her first word will be "Tammy," or "Kate" or "Tenecia," (Although Tenecia is a hard one, so that would actually impress me.) because those are her loving daycare "mamas."

But I have to admit, I am so happy with our routine. I wake up with her in the morning, feed her, get her dressed and sing to her. Kiss her chunky beautiful face until she pushes me away. And then I drive her to school, and hand her over to a woman who has become a good friend to me.I go to work, where I talk with adults, and I drink my coffee in peace, and I joke and I laugh, and I use my working brain to problem solve. When I get home in the afternoon, her daddy has picked her up, and I usually find them giggling together on the hammock in the sunshine on the porch. I spend my time with her, bathe her, feed her, and then kiss her goodnight.

My stay at home friends have it totally different. I imagine their days start out the same way as mine, but then they continue to give all of that energy (and it takes A LOT) to their child all. day. long. They sacrifice their adult conversation for Baby Einstein videos and picking up cheerios off the floor, and shooing the dog away every time they try to lick their babies in the face. They are 100% all day every day devoted to their babies. They will see the first time they roll over. They will witness the first crawls and steps. They will hear the first sounds that escape those cherub lips most likely be "mama" or "dada."

But they will cut their budgets. They will have breakdowns. They will see every bump, every scrape and every bruise, and feel the pain of witnessing your baby get hurt. They will only get a few hours or respite every day, and that's only if their babies are good nappers.  It's a tough world, and I couldn't do it. At least not at this point in my life.

My point is, we are all great moms. We do what we have to do to get by, and if that means working so you can appreciate your child more, then work. If that means staying at home so you can be sure to never miss a thing, then stay at home. Motherhood is a tough job no matter how you choose to do it. And know that no matter what choice you make as a mom, your children love you, and will one day appreciate the sacrifices you made to make a happy life for you both. Even if it takes them twenty years to get there (like it did with me and my mama.)

Happy Friday everyone! Here's hoping the weekend is filled with baby giggles and much needed rest for all of us!

Love,
Dominique