The 10 Most Awesome things about having a kid

I'll be honest, I've been complaining about my baby a lot lately. Don't get me wrong, she is the light of my world - but she's also a whole lot of work. That being said, I decided I better start looking for my bright side and make a list of the great things that come along with having a kid. With pictures. Because pictures make it more fun.

1.) Tax deductions. Lemme see them dolla dolla bills, ya'll! And by ya'll, I  mean the IRS, because my little tax deduction is going to be fed right back into her in some way.

2.) They say the darndest things. V isn't speaking yet, but I have four very verbal nieces who have said some real gems in their lifetime. Camryn is particularly hilarious. She once told my sister that she didn't ever want to be poor, because poor people have to drink seawater. What?!

3) One word. Halloween. Finally, an excuse to dress someone else up as exactly what you've always wanted to be. Nothing is off limits with a baby, because everything is adorable. Baby lion? Sure, that's cute, but why not take it up a notch and make a baby R2D2. AWESOME.

4) Chivalry all of a sudden becomes undead. And bonus! It totally applies to women now too. Ever been carrying your baby and your diaper bag and your stroller and balancing it all while trying to open a door? Yeah me too, except now most days men AND women rush to help me because, hey, I've got a cute kid. Even when she's screaming.

5)All of those kid friendly places you want to go but felt weird about? Not anymore! I've been to the McWane center 3 times! Granted, Chris and I went once before we had a child, but now we get to act totally immature and people think we are just trying to entertain her. fools! We act like this anyway!

6)You get to pretend to be embarrassed that your child loves you and ONLY YOU. When they are screaming and crying and yelling "maaaaaamaaaaa," sure, you can roll your eyes a bit and say things like "she's just in that really clingy age," or "she only wants me when she's crying." But you love it. You know you do.

7) Memes. Babies and kids make the BEST memes. Don't believe me? Check out http://reasonsmysoniscrying.tumblr.com/. 

8)Youtube. This kind of ties in to the Meme thing. Ever watched convos with my two year old? I have. One BILLION TIMES.

9)Immediate excuse to literally get out of anything. Don't feel like getting cornered at drunk Cousin Eddie's Christmas party this year? Uh oh! Somebody's babysitter totally just cancelled. Too bad.

10) You get to raise another human being. All the stuff you had to learn about on  your own growing up can now be passed on to your child. Granted, they will always have to learn things on their own too. But at this point your opinions are still pretty relevant to the times, right?

Anyway, kids are pretty great. Happy Wednesday, ya'll!

Love,

Dom

An Open Letter to My Daughter, Violet.

Dear Violet,

Remember when you came into this world, like, a month ago? Oh, it was five months ago? Well, despite that, I need to ask of you a favor.

Stop growing up so dang fast.

Seriously, what's your hurry? Lately you've been sporting an "I can do it on my own" attitude, and let me warn you, missy, it ain't gonna fly in this house. I will be holding your bottle, and be responsible for you sitting up as well. And what's with all of the talking? I swear, I can't get a word in edge-wise.

And another thing - we've got to talk about your pajama problem. You're growing in length entirely too fast. I barely had chance to let you wear those three month footless carter's pj's before I could barely even snap closed the bottom anymore. And they were so cute, Violet. So. Cute. You're in Old Navy 6 monthers now, and even those you're filling out already. Now I know you've got some Indiana blood in you on your daddy's side, but there's no need to strive for your basketball career just yet. Slow it down, alright? I'm going broke trying to keep up.

Lastly, I've noticed you eyeballin' my food lately. You're on formula, you got it? I don't care how much you want to try mashed bananas and carrots and things, I'm not ready. I mean, you're not ready. I knew this would start when I decided to let you have some rice cereal. I've heard it's a gateway food.

Look, sweetheart, I love you so much. You're my precious little monkey, and I intend to keep it that way for as long as I can. But I am willing to compromise.

You give me this one last month of cuddles, and tummy time, and total mama dependence, and I promise to consider some of your requests on your 6 month birthday. Until then, let's enjoy this together, shall we?

Love,
Mama

10 MORE Ways I'm on my way to becoming the most momish mom EVER

1) I just bought V four pairs of old navy footie pajamas because they were on sale and I am PSYCHED.
I am literally shaking with the anticipation of washing them and putting them on her cute little butt.

2) I squealed with delight and made a total fool of myself because Violet actually giggled in the pool when we took her swimming last weekend, instead of crying uncontrollably.

3) I've been singing Raffi songs out loud at work for 2 straight days.

4) Every night, after she falls asleep, I sneak in her room and put my hand on her belly to make sure she's still breathing. And then I turn her head because she still has that dang flat spot.

5) I've watched "The Hungry Little Caterpillar, and other stories by Eric Carle" every Saturday and Sunday morning for the past three weekends on netflix.

6) I went into Target with $60 worth of gift cards from my birthday with the determination to get something for myself for once. What was the loot?

a) a 3months+ pair of soothie pacifiers
b) a lime green romper with limes on it
c)a watermelon onesie
d) a baby spring float
e)a giraffe rattle and a soft teething book
f)a three pack of onesies
g) a pepsi. for me.

7) I have scheduled "naked time" in the morning and the afternoon, and I'm always fully clothed.

8) I call bottles "baba's" with a straight face.

9) I brag about how V is in the 95th percentile for height. "She's as tall as 6 month old!" I'll say.

10) If V makes so much as a peep in the middle of the night, it wakes me up. And then I have to check the monitor at least three more times to make sure she's ok. And then I say my desperate prayer that she will go back to sleep.

Ah, c'est la vie. Life of a mom.

Happy Tuesday, ya'll!

New Beginnings

It's 6:30(ish) on a Friday night, and I'm sitting here blogging with a warm cup of french vanilla coffee while my sweet baby naps in her swing and the hubs plays some crazy old school pixelated PS1 game.

And I couldn't be more content. I'm not living some wild life (unless you count drinking coffee at 6:30pm crazytown, woot woot!) but I'm thankful for these little luxuries. Last I left you, my future was uncertain at best. I had just been let go of my job, which was a total shock to my system. Now I know I'm not great at certain things - sports, cleaning up immediately after myself, blow drying my hair in the morning, for example - but I've never been told that I wasn't doing enough at my job. I've always had a strong work ethic. I've been working since I was 17, and was never one to party one night and call in sick the next, or blow off work for any other reason than a legitimate illness or planned vacation- for which I would always ask way in advance.

I try to be on time, and focus on my tasks each day, despite what might be happening in my personal life. As you know, sometimes that can be so hard. I've learned that one the hard way, unfortunately.

Anyway, I was fortunate enough to have the opportunity to pick up right where I left off in the position I held before. I went to the meeting with my former boss, surprisingly nervous about how much I wanted this to work out. Not because it had to - I mean, I have a baby to support, but because I liked what I did. Yes, yes, I complain about my work like any other red-blooded 'Merican, but in all honestly, I've always liked the company, the people, and the work. And I was good at it. At least, I always thought so.

To cut this short, I'll just say the meeting went well. I was offered the position on the spot, and with a slight but significant raise from what I was making when I left it. I was ecstatic! It felt like going home.

Even though I've been there for three years, two positions and four, (yes, FOUR) offices, coming full circle feels like a step forward in the right direction. I start Monday, and I'm nervous as to how things will go, but excited about the advantage I have that I've never had in any new job - I know what I'm doing already.  I've done this before and won't feel totally lost.

For now, I'm going to enjoy my weekend. It's the first one we've had in a while where we have zero plans. It's supposed to thunderstorm, which makes for a perfect time snuggling with my boo and baby boo. Happy Friday to all! Thanks for listening, as always. May your weekend be as relaxing and uneventful as I hope mine to be. We all need a break, right?

Love,
Dominique

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

To say the past few weeks have been rough have been the understatement of my year. V has been sick, work has been crazy, and I'm living last few days in my twenties, although I have to admit my 30th birthday has been the lowest thing on my radar for a while now.

Let's start with V. It all started last Monday after a great weekend with my sister, brother in law and my two adorable nieces. My sister kept commenting on how good V was - she never cried unless she was tired or hungry, and even if she did, it was a soft cry that could be easily fixed simply by picking her up. I beamed with pride as she was on her best behavior for two whole days.

And then it started.

Runny diapers, runny nose, low grade fever. Calls from my daycare saying she wasn't acting right, bouts of inconsolable crying, and waking up every. single. night. at 3am.

What happened to my happy baby? The worst of it seemed to culminate at her 4 month appointment. She was acting fine at the doctor (don't they always? Symptoms magically disappear right when you need them to present themselves.) and hadn't even so much as coughed a little bit. Doc was very pleased with her growth, 50th percentile for weight, and 95th for height. We were raising a supermodel.

Seeing as she appeared fine, Doc decided to go ahead and give her her shots. That night all hell broke loose. Her fever spiked, she coughed so much that she projectile spit up. It was a scene straight out of The Exorcist. I thought maybe I should call my mother ( a devout Catholic since birth) who could recommend a priest, or at the very least, offer up some prayers to the G-man to help our sweet darling.

Still sporting a fever on Thursday, I did the noble thing and kept her home from daycare, even though I had a note saying she could go. I wasn't going to get other babies sick. I didn't wish this on any other mom. Unfortunately, this was a very important day for me to not miss work, so I took her in her carseat, gave her a lovey and prayed there would be enough people who think she's adorable to hold her and keep her quiet while I got work done.

After that, she, Chris and I packed up and headed to Mobile for the weekend. He had a tennis tournament, and I honestly couldn't handle this baby alone for three days by myself. So I enlisted the help of my mother.

Although her fever dissipated, and her diapers became normal, the cough had gotten worse and developed a rattling sound in her chest. I was worried. When would it end?

All the while this is going on on Friday, I was periodically checking my work laptop to make sure my cases were getting paid for - some people would argue is the most important thing- but it was hard with V feeling so crummy.

Then Black Monday rolled around.

Since her fever was gone, I resolved to take her to school, and visit the after hours clinic about the cough. I called and made the 6pm appointment, honestly nervous about what kind of care she would receive. I was frazzled. Sleep deprived, worried sick, and I hadn't had an appetite in a week. Not to mention my bosses had been all over my case about things slipping through the cracks. There was mention of a 30 day period in which we would "reevaluate if this is a good fit."

I saw the writing on the wall, so I tried my best to make a good decision and use my time wisely. But Black Monday had other plans. That talk happened about a week ago, but Monday afternoon I got the worst news of all.

I was being let go. They were going in a "new direction" that apparently didn't include me, but included someone else who would just be doing my job. I wasn't devastated. This wasn't a shock, although the timing could have been better. I was stoic, an inflectionless robot asking questions about how long I had left with them, and about the staff position they were trying to set up for me at our other office. The exact one I had left to come work for them.

That night we took V to the clinic, where she was diagnosed with a double ear infection and bronchiolitis. I cried, she cried, and two hours later we were leaving to go to the pharmacy for her antibiotics, and to get me some food. I felt exhausted. The kind of defeated exhaustion you feel after an "ugly cry" like the one I always have watching the opening sequence of the pixar movie Up.

So that's where we are. I'm in employment limbo (my bosses requested I continue to work for them until the new position starts around July 8th.) I have a meeting with my former boss about the position this afternoon, and I feel at peace for the first time in a while. I think this will be good for me. I've learned a lot working where I have been, but the anxiety was killing me. I'll be happier going back to my home at the main office.


Happy Wednesday everyone. Wish me luck!

Happy 4 months, Booger boo!

Here's a little bit about my four month old beauty:

Her head is rounding out nicely, finally!
Her eyes are the same exact blue as mine, and I love it.
She still gets mistaken for a boy by almost every stranger who sees her.
She sleeps from 8:30 to 6am almost every single night like a boss!
She loves to kick her feet and has recently discovered using a jumper is sooooo fun.
She's either leggy or has a long torso, because everyone tells me how long she looks.
Her hair is turning blonde, just like I thought it would.

She thinks the following things are hilarious:

The Snot Sucker
raspberries on her feet, tummy or thighs
rustling long hair in her face
when we tell her she's pretty (the girl LIVES for compliments)
touching her nose and saying "boop!"
when we make her dance
spitting up

She hates:

Staying too long in her exersaucer
being put her in her swing before she's 100% out cold asleep
getting out of the bath
Breaks during her bottle where we try to give a chance to breathe. Her philosophy is "less breathing, more ounces NOW."
when no one wants to hang out with her at 6am on weekend mornings

That's just a little bit about our baby girl. Happy four months, Violet! Looking forward to what the next month brings for us!

Love,
Dominique

"I woke up this morning, and suddenly realized, we're all in this together."

Excuse me for quoting Ben Lee so early on a Friday morn. I couldn't think of a better way to express my thoughts this morning, though.

A friend of mine from my sorority days at school just recently went back to work after staying at home with her daughter. She said something this morning about how people have commented to her that putting your child in daycare is like paying someone to raise your child.

I'm not outraged. I'm not even surprised. This isn't the first time I've heard such comments. It's like my daddy likes to say, "Opinions are like a-holes. Everybody's got one."

I think there's always going to be stigmas attached to every kind of parenting style. Formula feeding moms are selfish. Breastfeeding moms don't care about their babies weight. Stay at home moms are spoiled. Working moms don't raise their own children.

To use another quote (this time from the beloved movie "Three men and a little lady."):

What a crock.

I'm fortunate enough to have a close up view of each of these allegedly opposing styles. I work, and formula feed. One of my dearest friends stays at home and breast feeds.

Let me tell you, both experiences are wonderful, and both have times when it's not exactly a picnic. I have my struggles with working. Daycare is expensive, and I miss her terribly at least once during every day. I'm afraid I'm going to miss the first time she rolls over, or crawls or takes steps. I'm afraid her first word will be "Tammy," or "Kate" or "Tenecia," (Although Tenecia is a hard one, so that would actually impress me.) because those are her loving daycare "mamas."

But I have to admit, I am so happy with our routine. I wake up with her in the morning, feed her, get her dressed and sing to her. Kiss her chunky beautiful face until she pushes me away. And then I drive her to school, and hand her over to a woman who has become a good friend to me.I go to work, where I talk with adults, and I drink my coffee in peace, and I joke and I laugh, and I use my working brain to problem solve. When I get home in the afternoon, her daddy has picked her up, and I usually find them giggling together on the hammock in the sunshine on the porch. I spend my time with her, bathe her, feed her, and then kiss her goodnight.

My stay at home friends have it totally different. I imagine their days start out the same way as mine, but then they continue to give all of that energy (and it takes A LOT) to their child all. day. long. They sacrifice their adult conversation for Baby Einstein videos and picking up cheerios off the floor, and shooing the dog away every time they try to lick their babies in the face. They are 100% all day every day devoted to their babies. They will see the first time they roll over. They will witness the first crawls and steps. They will hear the first sounds that escape those cherub lips most likely be "mama" or "dada."

But they will cut their budgets. They will have breakdowns. They will see every bump, every scrape and every bruise, and feel the pain of witnessing your baby get hurt. They will only get a few hours or respite every day, and that's only if their babies are good nappers.  It's a tough world, and I couldn't do it. At least not at this point in my life.

My point is, we are all great moms. We do what we have to do to get by, and if that means working so you can appreciate your child more, then work. If that means staying at home so you can be sure to never miss a thing, then stay at home. Motherhood is a tough job no matter how you choose to do it. And know that no matter what choice you make as a mom, your children love you, and will one day appreciate the sacrifices you made to make a happy life for you both. Even if it takes them twenty years to get there (like it did with me and my mama.)

Happy Friday everyone! Here's hoping the weekend is filled with baby giggles and much needed rest for all of us!

Love,
Dominique